And Then I Had Fruit!

So my ex-girlfriend has been on a fitness kick, and that's worked out quite nicely for moi¹. The other day, she wanted company at the gym, which is crazy because she never went when I asked her to accompany me (but whatever). Still, I ain't petty, so I got my bottled water, my cellular telephone, and my speedos. And then I actually got on the treadmill. Seriously. I ran jogged jog/walked a healthy distance. I might even do it again soon.

And when I got back home and opened the fridge, I didn't feel that overwhelming sense of guilt I'm used to. You know why? Because I ate an apple. Fo' realz. And it was kinda delicious.

If this keeps up, I might actually lose some weight, which would be awesome. Oh wait. No, it wouldn't. I'd just end up posting one of those shirtless-in-the-bathroom-mirror pics. And then I'd get all egotistical. And then I'd invade a small country. Probably.